the tide

Sometimes I feel surrounded by water.  My head is swimming, drifting and I’m swaying with the tide, just letting go and floating on.  I’m regaining my strength for the next surge of willpower.  Time heals, right?


Image: Kurt Tong, Gosling Lake



Today I am on the cusp of something new.  I can see the future spreading out ahead of me and I can see the past smoldering behind.  I cry when I think of how things could have been but smile as I imagine what is yet to be.  For all the things I didn’t say or do that I would have liked to, I will have ample opportunity to try anew.  Time to make do with what I have learned, keep those I loved in my heart, and be strong.

“Memory is a part of the present, it builds us up inside. It knits our bones to our muscles and keeps our hearts pumping. It is memory that reminds our bodies to work and memory that reminds our spirits to work too. It keeps us who we are.” —Gregory Maguire

And one of these days I am going to take time to cry.

“Ah, no nostalgia hurts as much as nostalgia for things that never existed!” —Fernando Pessoa, The Book of Disquiet


Image: Kristen Drozdowski, Bixby Bridge, Big Sur, California.

substance and virtue

I had written previously about experience and recently heard a phrase (from Emerson?) that stated the closer actions are to thoughts the more divine the man.

Today I heard these lyrics:

And death is at your doorstep

And it will steal your innocence

But it will not steal your substance

Mumford and Sons, Timshel

I realized I was missing a piece of the puzzle; purity (innocence) cannot last, but goodness (substance) can, and that is the challenge, to not become disheartened by experience (death) and lose virtue.

Image: Audrey Kawasaki, girl in static